Sweet memories

While providing after-death care for your loved one it is important to pause and take moments to be present with the experience. Doing little things to appreciate your loved one can create a special memory for years to come.

Here are some ideas for doing that, but it is more important that you do what is comfortable and appropriate for your family:

• write a note about your loved one and put it in their coffin
• when it is time to close the coffin, pause before you cover the face of your loved one to look at them one last time. Perhaps you want to cover their face yourself or put a beautiful scarf or piece of lace over their face.
• have a leave taking ceremony where you speak a memory or thought before the coffin leaves your home
• speak the lineage of the loved one. Example: son of John Doe and Mary Smith Doe, brother to Mildred and Michael Doe, father of Leo and Charles and Catherine Doe, etc.
• list the kindnesses you can remember your loved one doing and say them or write them on their coffin
• place a small table by the deceased and put rose petals on the table with their wedding ring or favorite jewelry resting in a rose peteal
• trace your hand print on the casket and fill it in with words or art to express your love for the deceased
• bless the body of the loved one. Example: We appreciate and bless your lips which have said such kind words to us and spoken your truth. We bless your hands that have served us through the years and have cared for us so deeply.
• hold a vigil letting friends and loved ones know the “Calling Hours”

You do not have to limit yourself to one memorial service. Take as many opportunities as you can to create a special moment of reflection. Doing this will nourish your memory for years.